Yesterday we had our first real 'pregnancy scare'. For the past couple weeks, I've been leaking this fluid (still am) and I was wondering if it was amniotic fluid. I messaged my ever supportive and knowledgeable sisters-in-law for some advice and my worries were calmed. It sounded normal, the 'leaky faucet' so to speak, was just a joy of pregnancy. Then just a few days ago, around Saturday I noticed that I wasn't feeling the baby move so much. I started to keep track of it because it seemed so much less than normal. Usually at night I can feel it the most and I had only felt small movements a handful of times. Same for Sunday and Monday. I was struggling with the feelings of being too paranoid and becoming that pesky new mom that worries about every little thing. To me though, this didn't seem little and yes, it sounds funny, but I was thinking of the baby as a fish and his fish bowl was draining slowly.
I finally decided to call my Ob's office and explain the weeks of leaking and the lack of movement over the past few days. I was told to get to emerge asap and have a stress test for the baby and check my vitals. That's what got me scared. Jeff and I had been worrying for the past few days about the movement, but this sounded urgent, so I left work, picked up Jeff on the way to hospital and got admitted. They hooked me up to the monitor, and the sound of that loud and beautiful heartbeat, made us both cry with relief. Such a sweet and reassuring sound! I was strapped to another monitor to check for cramping and that was looking fine as well. I also had to push a button when I felt the baby move, and what do you know, the little sprout began moving like crazy when we were there!! It was very noticeable because there would be sound as well when she moved. We were so thankful to see and hear that everything was alright, despite the weird symptoms. I was tested for amniotic fluid and that came back negative as well, so the little fishy has a nice full bowl :) I kept apologizing to the nurse for seeming so paranoid because everything turned out just fine and looked great. She reassured me that I should never feel bad about being a concerned parent, and to come in if I'm ever unsure about anything. I really took that to heart.
Later, when we were released, Jeff and I joked that the baby just wanted some attention :) So all in all, we are fine. I need to make sure that I'm resting enough and remember that I'm pregnant and can't really do some things at the pace I'm used to. The whole ordeal was a huge reminder that yes, we needed a lot of faith to even experience being pregnant, but that the journey isn't 'over until that healthy babe is snuggled in our arms.
April 6, 2011
March 14, 2011
Miracle
Everyday I marvel at God's ability to create precious lives. He blessed us with this little miracle and gave to us the gift of life. What a big responsibility, an honor to be graced with. With everyday the importance of this little life becomes more and more real. The movements are a beautiful reminder that I have a life to protect, to nurture, to love. What a blessing. I am truly overcome with emotion that God, in His perfect timing, gave us this wonderful gift, never to be taken for granted. I am thrilled to know that I am going to be a mother, that in a few months I will hold our precious newborn and know that he/she was part of God's perfect plan. My heart bursts with love and joy already at the mere thought of meeting for the first time!
Getting things ready for this little sprouts arrival has been so much fun :) Clearing out space, getting furniture, buying baby clothes for our baby just makes me giddy! Picking out names (we need to narrow our long list down!) researching strollers, signing up for prenatal classes. All these things, that a year ago, I was starting to believe were never going to happen for us. The reality of parenting is setting in as well. We are going to join a class at church called Spiritual Parenting and are looking forward to learning how we, as parents, can model and show God's love to our child.
The decal that I put on the wall in my craft room, which I secretly prayed would be our baby's room, is the perfect fit for how I feel towards this entire experience.
Getting things ready for this little sprouts arrival has been so much fun :) Clearing out space, getting furniture, buying baby clothes for our baby just makes me giddy! Picking out names (we need to narrow our long list down!) researching strollers, signing up for prenatal classes. All these things, that a year ago, I was starting to believe were never going to happen for us. The reality of parenting is setting in as well. We are going to join a class at church called Spiritual Parenting and are looking forward to learning how we, as parents, can model and show God's love to our child.
The decal that I put on the wall in my craft room, which I secretly prayed would be our baby's room, is the perfect fit for how I feel towards this entire experience.
"Everyday holds a possibility of a miracle"
24 weeks
February 7, 2011
Butterfly Wings
I am so thankful for this pregnancy. To be able to experience the movements, the growth, even the morning sickness :) has truly been a blessing, and something I cherish every minute of the day. I've been feeling those little butterfly wings, and it creates in me such a sense of awe and wonderment of what our Heavenly Father is capable of doing. A tiny heart, beating within me, and growing more and more everyday. I can't wait to meet you, precious one!
Now that I've been able to feel the baby's movement, ever so small, the thought of a tiny life being shaped inside of me has really been sinking in. My gowing belly (5 days and we're half way there!) is also a reminder that I'm not just taking care of myself anymore, but already being a mother to this tiny little being. I've begun to get the 'nesting' urge, and as much as I would like to keep my craft room accessible for making baby announcements, I also have a desire to start putting the baby's room together. I've been thinking of furniture, fabrics and wall art to create. Again, to be planning this, is such a blessing.
I'm excited to meet our new obgyn Dr. Bow, whom Motan recommended us to. I'm excited to see the baby (it's been so long!) and I'm sure the sprout is so much bigger! I've also signed up for prenatal classes and they begin in mid April. So much to look forward to!
"I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart ..." Jeremiah 1:5
Now that I've been able to feel the baby's movement, ever so small, the thought of a tiny life being shaped inside of me has really been sinking in. My gowing belly (5 days and we're half way there!) is also a reminder that I'm not just taking care of myself anymore, but already being a mother to this tiny little being. I've begun to get the 'nesting' urge, and as much as I would like to keep my craft room accessible for making baby announcements, I also have a desire to start putting the baby's room together. I've been thinking of furniture, fabrics and wall art to create. Again, to be planning this, is such a blessing.
I'm excited to meet our new obgyn Dr. Bow, whom Motan recommended us to. I'm excited to see the baby (it's been so long!) and I'm sure the sprout is so much bigger! I've also signed up for prenatal classes and they begin in mid April. So much to look forward to!
December 21, 2010
Hallelujah!!!
It's official, no beating around the bush. WE ARE PREGNANT!!!!!!! We are officially 12 weeks 3 days and we are overwhelmed with emotion. Amazement, shock, THANKFUL, awe, nervous, excited! To this day I still stop and think, "Wow, I'm going to be a MOM!?!" The idea is so foreign to me, that it hasn't really sunk in yet. I am starting to get a bit of a baby bump, a BABY BUMP!! and it's feeling more real as the days go on. Our due date is July 2, 2011 and we are so looking forward to becoming parents.
We had our FET on Oct 14 and all went really well. Both blasts made it through the thawing stage and they were graded at 3AB and 3BA. On Oct 24 we went in for blood work and my cell phone was burning a hole in my pocket all day. We couldn't focus at church, because we were so jittery waiting for that call. I had a different feeling this time around and I felt different. I've been asked, "How so?" and I couldn't explain, just different then the last cycle. The phone finally rang later that day around 4 and when the nurse said the test was positive my response was "You're serious?!?" it was surreal, I was so shocked on the phone that I could hardy listen to the rest. It was positive. I hung up the phone and Jeff and I cried and hugged out of the shear relief and happiness that overwhelmed us. We knew that it was just the beginning and we weren't 'out of the woods' yet, so to speak. The beta was only 87 which wasn't really high, but anything over 25 is positive. We were over the moon, and really just in shock. We sat and held my tummy and poured prayers of thanks to God and for Him to wrap His arms around the little miracle He created. About 15 min later my mom called just to chat and I cried out the news to her. We shared a cry over the phone and it all felt so surreal. We later called Jeff's mom and dad and they were ecstatic to hear the news. Funny thing is we were so wound up with excitement and jitters, that we couldn't stay in the house and we ended up going to Telus World of Science to watch an Imax about Mt. Everest!!! :) I'll never forget that day, it was amazing.
It has been so great being able to share with all the wonderful people that have supported us through this wild journey. We are loving the pregnancy, and can't wait!! to meet our little miracle in just over 6 months!! I don't want to make this post too long, I could write forever, but now I can be free to write updates and share this new, and exciting chapter. Praise the Lord, and may He continue to mold and shape this little life He created.
We had our FET on Oct 14 and all went really well. Both blasts made it through the thawing stage and they were graded at 3AB and 3BA. On Oct 24 we went in for blood work and my cell phone was burning a hole in my pocket all day. We couldn't focus at church, because we were so jittery waiting for that call. I had a different feeling this time around and I felt different. I've been asked, "How so?" and I couldn't explain, just different then the last cycle. The phone finally rang later that day around 4 and when the nurse said the test was positive my response was "You're serious?!?" it was surreal, I was so shocked on the phone that I could hardy listen to the rest. It was positive. I hung up the phone and Jeff and I cried and hugged out of the shear relief and happiness that overwhelmed us. We knew that it was just the beginning and we weren't 'out of the woods' yet, so to speak. The beta was only 87 which wasn't really high, but anything over 25 is positive. We were over the moon, and really just in shock. We sat and held my tummy and poured prayers of thanks to God and for Him to wrap His arms around the little miracle He created. About 15 min later my mom called just to chat and I cried out the news to her. We shared a cry over the phone and it all felt so surreal. We later called Jeff's mom and dad and they were ecstatic to hear the news. Funny thing is we were so wound up with excitement and jitters, that we couldn't stay in the house and we ended up going to Telus World of Science to watch an Imax about Mt. Everest!!! :) I'll never forget that day, it was amazing.
It has been so great being able to share with all the wonderful people that have supported us through this wild journey. We are loving the pregnancy, and can't wait!! to meet our little miracle in just over 6 months!! I don't want to make this post too long, I could write forever, but now I can be free to write updates and share this new, and exciting chapter. Praise the Lord, and may He continue to mold and shape this little life He created.
December 14, 2010
remembering the real meaning of Christmas
It's so easy to get wrapped up (pardon the pun!) in all the Christmas festivities. Decorating, making lists, braving the malls, buying the perfect gifts, wrapping with bows and ribbons, then eagerly anticipating opening your own special presents. We take pride in what we have, what we can give, how many times we can say cheerfully, "Merry Christmas!" But amidst all the eggnogg, tinkling bells and lights, can we remember the small and humble beginnings of why we celebrate Christmas in the first place? A tiny little baby, a miracle born. We have turned this awe filled moment into an all month ordeal of fake tinsel and sugar cookies. Don't get me wrong, I'm no Scrooge, or Grinch. I love decorating my tree, buying something that says, "I love you", embracing warm hugs from family, and walking through winter wonderland. Yet while enjoying these wonderful times, I need to stop to marvel at the tiny, yet amazing gift God sent us. His small, precious Son. Without this tiny person, I would not be the saved, forgiven, and unconditionally loved person that I am today, taking for granted all that I've been blessed with. Think back to Mary and Joseph, they were without possessions, riding a donkey, and had nowhere to go. No warm home all decked out in lights and garland, with a fire crackling and hot chocolate steaming. Jesus was born in a barn, in a manger full of hay. Kings, shepherds, and wise men came in awe to see Him. This is what I need to celebrate this Christmas, the birth of my Lord and Savior, the only One who can bring full contentment and peace into my heart, this season and throughout my life.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiRhFKpxHD8&feature=fvw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiRhFKpxHD8&feature=fvw
October 23, 2010
little note
Wow it's been quite the ride at work these days! The whole school received a new timetable and students and staff are needing to adjust to all the changes. The days have been going by fairly quickly that's for sure! The weekends are such a blessing to get some rest and relax for awhile. I noticed the other day that a Christmas catalogue was out already and can't quite believe that it's only 2 months away! I'm really starting to believe that the older you get the faster time goes by : (
The medications that I've been taking are going well, and we're looking forward to the next steps in our FET. No definite timeline (again) but we're excited (and a bit anxious) to be starting a new cycle. Taking it slow and not being in a rush is what we're striving for, by praying for patience and calm hearts.
The medications that I've been taking are going well, and we're looking forward to the next steps in our FET. No definite timeline (again) but we're excited (and a bit anxious) to be starting a new cycle. Taking it slow and not being in a rush is what we're striving for, by praying for patience and calm hearts.
October 5, 2010
Taking a Breath
Sometimes we just need to stop and breathe. Take a moment and look at all the beauty around us. To share some time with a loved one. I'm realizing that my life is too busy. We live in such a hustle and bustle society and I am getting sucked right in to the craziness of it. Being busy isn't a bad thing. I like not having time to dwell on matters that are out of my control, and rather work out details such as double booking a night and deciding what to do about it. But as I mentioned before, I need to stop and take into account all the blessings in my life. Wonderful husband, good career, great family, close friends, involvement in church, participating in sports. There are so many great things in life, and yet we are constantly pressured into wanting what we don't have, wondering why we can't enjoy this or that. And yet, despite not being pregnant or having a baby already, I feel contentment. My life is full and rich. Can it get even more fulfilled and richer? Yes. But do I feel a need or a want for that? The answer is no, I am content with the pace of my life right now.
Will we decide to start a second cycle, yes, I think we will very soon. The reason we feel we can is because we are both in a good space right now. Content. With life, each other, our faith. We needed to wait this long. To wait for a sense of joyful anticipation at the thought of a frozen cycle, not out of desperation due to a failed cycle. We've made appointments, and I'm taking some medications. No rush, no hurry but in His time. I'm slowly getting my body ready to start the process over, and I'm looking forward to it. A month ago, I wouldn't be able to say that, but now the thought of becoming pregnant excites me. So we will take days as they come and in those days we will take moments, to stop and think of just how far we've come, how our lives have changed and how truly blessed we feel.
Will we decide to start a second cycle, yes, I think we will very soon. The reason we feel we can is because we are both in a good space right now. Content. With life, each other, our faith. We needed to wait this long. To wait for a sense of joyful anticipation at the thought of a frozen cycle, not out of desperation due to a failed cycle. We've made appointments, and I'm taking some medications. No rush, no hurry but in His time. I'm slowly getting my body ready to start the process over, and I'm looking forward to it. A month ago, I wouldn't be able to say that, but now the thought of becoming pregnant excites me. So we will take days as they come and in those days we will take moments, to stop and think of just how far we've come, how our lives have changed and how truly blessed we feel.
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